tobealonesoldier

Ok, so maybe my last post was a bit heavy on the play-by-play of my life. Let me mix it up a bit. I'll be more than happy to open my life a little more to you and try to convey what it's like to be a lone soldier. I also think I promised a post more about thoughts and feelings a few weeks ago. One thing that my studies over the past year have taught me is to always repay my debts as soon as possible.

I was told/cautioned back in Chicago that is it easy for a lone soldier to become an alone soldier. I have been so fortunate to have an incredibly supportive family in Tel Aviv. David and Amy and their daughters have been like an adoptive family to me. They initially welcomed me in with open arms and I am yet (I hope, haha) to overstay my welcome. I come home on weekends and return to base on Sunday. I don't see them so much anymore, but they are always happy to see me and provide me with anything I need. (One cute story: the other week, Amy was home with Shai (3), who wasn't feeling well and wanted to know where everyone in the family was. 'Where's Lena?' 'At school, honey.' 'Kaya?' 'Also at school.' 'Abba?' 'He's at work.' 'Daniel?' 'In the army.' I'm just extremely humbled and honored that Shai considers me a part of the family, or maybe just the apartment's new jungle gym [see photo]. First, I would like to thank the Academy, and of course my fans, and I would also like to thank....) I cannot imagine what it would have been like to come to Israel without any connections, as many of my friends did months before Mikveh. Kudos to them.

Lone soldiers have different living options in Israel. It is common for us to live with extended family (if we have any), stay on a kibbutz (where we can be adopted by an Israeli family), or to rent an apartment. I have begun to look into moving to a kibbutz. I love it in Tel Aviv, but I'm looking for a place with, quite frankly, my own room. Also on kibbutzim are other lone soldiers, so it'll be a good place to chill with more guys my age, going through similar experiences as me, when I come back every few weekends. It's an option I'm strongly considering, but the process takes time. I've talked with the Mishakit Tash (a girl on base who's job is to help soldiers with personal issues) and as it stands right now, I should get the next opening at one of two kibbutzim where a few of my friends already live.

Even with a family all around me, I certainly still feel like a stranger in a strange land. Never mind trying to feel like an Israeli, I'm simply concerning myself with feeling at home 6,000 miles away. I used to think to myself "why am I here?" However, since Mikveh Alon has ended and my IDF future is imminent, I have gotten caught up in my life and have become more certain in my decisions. Still, life (or the IDF) gave me a big slap-in-the-face reminder that I am indeed a lone soldier. During the tekkes last week for the conclusion of Mikveh Alon, many of the soldiers had families in attendance. I was left alone, with only my thoughts and other lone soldiers to keep me company. It was one thing to finish Mikveh, but it will certainly be another to make it through seven months of basic and advanced training and be alone for that tekkes. It is one thing to go through this life in the military in your own country, and quite another to do it in such a foreign place. Even when I am home on weekends, I often feel hurried, already looking Sunday morning when I will again walk to the train station and travel back up north. It is very difficult to feel grounded. Maybe this has something to do with living with David, Amy and the family, how I come home on Friday, and each family member is often busy with their own lives, running here and there for school, activities, work. It has been difficult to feel grounded and completely at ease since joining. Part of this, I believe, is because I've been anxious to get out of Mikveh. I want to start the 'real' army, as I've talked about before. Eventually I will develop a routine at my new base and start to feel more at home in Israel. but for now, such is the life.

The fire in my heart to serve Israel is alive and burning. Even if I were completely alone, it would not be extinguished. What keeps it strong? In large part, it is what this week has brought to many US college campuses: Israel Apartheid Week. From Monday to Friday, pro-Palestinian academics, professors, activists, and students host events or speakers dedicated to denouncing Israel as an apartheid state, likening it to South Africa. Last year during IAW was the first time that I really started actively advocating, or rather, defending, for Israel. It amazes me how intelligent, supposedly liberal and open-minded people can demonize a nation and a state to the extent they seek to achieve. Last year's IAW really brought out the reality, for me, that pro-Palestinian supporters are really anti-Israel demonstrators.

On my campus last March, IAW was complete with its own events, including a faux "apartheid wall" where hyped-up students, many of whom spewed non-sensical phrases and slogans, shouted through a microphone to classmates passing through to class about the supposed evils of Israel, the world's only Jewish state. Needless to say, I took exception to this and decided to have a few words (pleasant ones, I hoped) with a few of them. What started as a simple conversation, in which I searched, in vain, for moderate voices, turned into a five-on-one free-for-all. Can you guess who was the one? Damn straight, and proud of it! However, what I soon learned was that it was impossible to reason with people set in their beliefs. People who are for Israel or against Israel are not able to be convinced in the merits of other arguments. That goes for me too; no one will be able to tell me that Israel should not exist. Instead, what Israeli activists should focus on is convincing the majority of people who know nothing about the issues people face on this side of the world. That itself is a very difficult task, but there are people who are on the vanguard of this effort. One of these is Sgt. Benjamin Anthony.

A few weeks after IAW, the Jewish organizations on campus held Israel Peace and Israel Independence Weeks. It was a fortnight of activity for the promotion of Israel and hopes for peace. One night, we had a former IDF soldier come to speak to a group of pro- and anti-Israel students. Ben Anthony made aliyah from Britain and fought the Second Lebanon War in 2006. After his service, he started an organization called Our Soldiers Speak (click), in which he explains to audiences the front-line experiences of Israel's conflicts, as opposed to what the media portrays. When he came to my campus last year, he requested a diverse audience, with supporters and detractors. I believe his intent is not only to field difficult questions from anti-Israel people and provide a solid and carefully crafted response, but also to demonstrate to the pro-Israel students that we don't have to be cowered into intimidation by the often volatile-prone nature of anti-Israel activism and their use of such difficult and emotional terms like "genocide," "apartheid" or "human rights violations." For example, in response to a comment that one Palestinian posed explaining how his grandmother feels humiliated while trying to pass through security checkpoints in the West Bank, Sgt. Anthony took the time to explain the purpose of the checkpoints (they were established during the Second Intifadah where the only way Israel knew how to defend herself was to physically create a barrier to control and monitor the flow of people to and from Israel proper) and then provided perhaps the most human of all arguments in support of Israel's practices: "I am truly sorry for the inconvenience your grandmother faces, but, simply put, I don't want to be blown up."

It is this most basic of human desires--to exist, to live--that was one of my initial driving forces pushing me to fight for Israel. There are many people out there who do not wish me, as a Jew, to have even the simplest of earthly desires. (Anyone who tells you that anti-Semitism is a thing of the past is sadly mistaken. In fact, in many parts of the world, it is on the rise.) I spoke to my brother, Eric, the other week and he mentioned how Sgt. Anthony had returned to U of I for another talk. This time, however, he spoke more about struggles he and his soldiers faced with themselves, not so much about Lebanon or living in Israel. According to Eric, there were times throughout his service that they pondered the following scenario: someone has a gun toward your head and says, 'convert or die.' What do you do?

Eric posed the same question to me. I didn't have a quick response. On the surface, I suppose it is certainly something that I need to consider, being in the military. But on a deeper level, this simple question is directed at something much more profound: would I be willing to die for my religion, for my belief in Judaism? On the one hand, it is easy to say, "Yes! I feel that strongly and am willing to sacrifice my life to practice as I please." On the other hand, I could respond with, "Sure I'll convert, then I'll just quietly practice Judaism" (much like Jews in Spain did after their expulsion in 1492). The truth? I don't know what I would do. The Israelis' response? Action; take the gun or die trying.

I wear a kippah everyday to remind myself of many things, but one of them is that I am here as a Jew. I am not Israeli, nor am I a mercenary fighting for any certain political cause (there's no way I can ever be given 'mercenary' status making 700 shekels a month!). So, to an extent--and I'm not going to skirt around this reality--I am certainly fighting a religious war. However, the battle lines have shifted. As I've mentioned before, I do not believe Israel today is threatened by Damascus, Beirut, Riyadh, or Baghdad (Tehran is a different story). Instead, Israel is losing the political and public relations battle. And where are those battle lines? On college campuses and in government corridors. It starts with IAW or the BDS (Boycott, Divestment, Sanctions) Movement (click). It appears to be directed at the Knesset's (Parliament) policies. It soon develops into a cause and then becomes a necessity. But if you come to Israel, if you study its history, if you learn about the relations between Jews and Arabs/Muslims, Israelis and Palestinians, if you take the time to listen to all sides, learn the facts, and see the results, then, I believe, you will get a much different picture than the ones who spearhead IAW or BDS paint for their consumers. You soon realize that much of anti-Israel rhetoric and activity is in fact anti-Semitism, but, unfortunately, there aren't enough people with the chutzpah necessary to call it as such.

Although not always the biggest advocate for Israel, Thomas Friedman said it best: "Criticizing Israel is not anti-Semitic, and saying so is vile. But singling out Israel for opprobrium and international sanction--out of all proportion to any other party in the Middle East--is anti-Semitic, and not saying so is dishonest."

So, how does it feel to be a lone soldier? How does it feel to be fighting for my people in one of the world's strongest militaries, in a volatile region, amidst a hotbed of upheaval and unrest? How does it feel to know more parts of the M-16 in Hebrew than in English? How does it feel to be living in one of the world's most beautiful and diverse country? A country that is energetic, humanitarian, passionate and also lawless on so many levels? How does it feel to be on the other side of the world, without constant connection to friends and loved ones? And how does it feel to be in Tzanchanim, the Paratroopers, for my IDF service? (BLEEPING) AWESOME!!!

Lebanon and Egypt

If you've turned on the news in the past two weeks, or really bothered to get out of bed for that matter, then it would look like the Middle East is in a complete chaos. Well, it certainly is. In fact, as I look out the window right now, I see cars obeying traffic signals, people walking in and out of stores as normal, kids going to school....What?! No chaos here?! Yep, Israel is a stable country, and has been so since 1948. So what's going on here? Is Egypt going to go to war with Israel? Is the IDF now on high alert? Am I being rushed through training and sent to Israel's borders? What the hell is going on?!?!

First, take a deep breath...in, out, in, out. Better? Now, I won't spend the time here going over everything that is happening in Egypt. Read a newspaper and you can get the scoop there. I'll give a broad brushstroke and then tell you how it affects me.

On January 25th, the Egyptian people started protesting in Cairo...and they haven't stopped. In the past few days its gotten violent, and President Hosni Mubarak, after valiantly offering to fall on his sword by way of vacating the presidency in a few months, will likely be out of the country in the next week. What was the immediate spark for the protests? I don't know. But these people are protesting thirty years of dissatisfaction with Mubarak's reign. I'm not talking about some small tax increases or slightly lowered standard of living. Rather, Egypt has been under a state of emergency for thirty years, and the people are angry about living in an autocratic state, rampant inflation of simple food prices, lack of economic opportunities and advancement, and also, likely, the fact that they see their leader as under the West's thumb. So, they protest.

It first started in Tunisia, now it's in Egypt. The wave of hostility is spreading to Jordan, Lebanon, Syria, and the West Bank. On one hand, I am ready to cheer on any advocate for democracy. On the other hand, as was certainly evidenced by Iran circa 1979, revolutions can be a very dangerous thing and it is likely that it is not the people with the country's best interest in mind who will come to power, but rather those who can manipulate events and win the most popular support.

The biggest fear now in Egypt is that Mubarak's regime will fall and Islamists will take over, namely the Muslim Brotherhood. Although Mubarak himself will be out of power, that does not necessarily mean the government will fall too. For Israel, it is much better if the government does not implode and new people come in and take over. Why? Because Israel has enjoyed thirty years of peace and relative stability with the country that was once its most dangerous enemy. The current government has respected the peace that was established in 1979. Israel's primary concern is that whoever emerges as the leader of Egypt will not respect or recognize the peace treaty.

And it is likely that Egypt could fall to Islamists. It is the largest Arab state and a very religious one at that. Iran, after violently suppressing its own rebellions two years ago, thanks in part to the Obama administration staying mum as people were dying on the streets of Tehran, is using its influence in the Arab states to mobilize Islamic parties. The Muslim Brotherhood is one such party. So who are these guys? In short, they are a political organization that wants to Islamicize the world. They are the largest and most effective group in Egypt, despite being banned for the better part of thirty years. They are also a multi-national organization. They are in Lebanon, Syria and Jordan. They are also in Gaza, but there you know them as Hamas.

Anyway, long story short: Israel has fortunately not had to think about a war with Egypt for over thirty years. It has trained the IDF to fight in the north with Lebanon and Syria. Egypt's turmoil has raised some legitimate existential security concerns for Israel.

So what's the deal with Lebanon? Well, there is no "deal" currently, but there was a big deal five years ago during the Second Lebanese War. In 2006, Israel invaded southern Lebanon. Why? The immediate spark was the capture of two IDF soldiers. But a bigger issue was the growing strength of Hezbollah and its continuing insistence of firing rockets into civilian centers in northern Israel. Hmmm, seems to be a trend with terrorist organizations firing rockets into Israel, the world being silent, and then Israel finally, reluctantly taking action, only to be lambasted by the international community. (In case you didn't get the hint, I'm talking about Operation Cast Lead in Gaza, 2009-2010. And, by the way, these aren't a 'few' rockets, I'm talking about thousands over a few years.)

At Mikveh Alon, we talked a lot about the Second Lebanon War. It was the main focus this week of our Tzionut (Zionism). We talked about the war, its purpose, after-effects, etc., and also of the 1948 War of Independence. On Tuesday evening, my entire plugot gathered in an auditorium for a commemoration of the Second Lebanon War. Different soldiers had been selected throughout the week to do a short reading, or sing a song, or act out a battle, etc., for the show. The "battle" that was re-enacted is a famous story throughout Israel. During the war, a group of soldiers were clearing out buildings as part of a patrol. They start taking fire and have to hunker down in a room in one of the buildings. Suddenly, a grenade is thrown into the room. Without hesitating, Roi Klein cried out, "Shma Yisrael!" and leapt onto the grenade, just before it exploded. His decision was the supreme act of sacrifice and saved his soldiers. I encourage you to search him online and learn about his life and sacrifice.

The day after, Wednesday, we left base in the afternoon because Thursday was Yom Siddurim for lone soldiers. I gladly came back to Tel Aviv, and crashed from 7:30 pm to 6:30 am. It was glorious. I was able to finally also enjoy the city; I went out and did some shopping on Thursday and Friday. After three months of being here (yes, three months since November 3rd!), I finally bought a Hebrew-English dictionary. It was nice to pretend to live like a civilian again; usually when I get home on Fridays I take a few hour nap or just veg. Then on Saturday I am often (like this morning) nursing a hangover from a great night out on the town with some buddies from the army.

This was a nice long weekend, especially because I will now be on base for the next two weeks, straight. That's right, I'm not going to be home next weekend because my plugot is doing guard duty starting on Thursday. We have to stay and guard the base over the weekend. I'll let you know how that goes in a couple of weeks.

Just one bit of bad news: it does not look like I will be able to try-out for Tzanchanim, or do any infantry unit, like Nahal, with my 72 health profile. I contacted one of commanding officers where I had my tzav rishon and he said I need to raise my profile for infantry. I'm going to try and get that done this week, but, especially because my eyes are the issue, there is no way to fudge that for a doctor. But even still, I am going to continue to train for the gibbush. And, honestly, at the end of the day, because this is Israel, if you want something, generally you just push your way to getting what you want and good things can happen.

But, with whatever I do after Mikveh Alon, I'll be serving Israel, which is what I came to do. Don't be too concerned with events in Egypt. Actually, Egypt has proved very enlightening on another front. One thing I did not mention as the cause of the protests was the 'plight' of the Palestinian people. How odd, right? I mean, if you read anything that, say, Obama says you would think that the one underlying issue throughout the Middle East is the Palestinian issue. Surely, he believes, if you solve that issue then you can have peace and stability throughout the region! Finally, if the Wikileaks didn't already prove it, maybe the turmoil in Egypt and the rest of the Arab world demonstrates that these people aren't clamoring Palestinian statehood; they are demonstrating and dying just for economic opportunities, a voice in politics, and reasonable bread prices. Sure the Egyptian protesters have claimed that Mubarak is controlled by Israel, but they don't say, "give the Palestinians a state then we'll go home." It is one of the most absurd claims that Obama and others have made: solve the Palestinian issue and you can then address Iran and other issues of the region. The reality, as people familiar with the Middle East know, is the other way around; confront Iran to keep them in check and give the people freedoms, then the region will begin to look more democratic and safe.

Oh yeah, and I finally got paid by the IDF on February 1st. I'm a working man!!

Thanks for reading.